House painting is in full swing... it has been raining like mad here for the last few days, so the painting has moved indoors! That's a double-edged sword... I am so excited to have freshly painted beautiful rooms, but the OCD part of Caroline (that would be a big part, by the way) is pretty freaked out by having my stuff spread out all over the house. It definitely looks like a bomb went off in the downstairs areas.
I guess the one fun thing about tearing things apart this much is the opportunity to rearrange furniture. I love rearranging stuff, and this gives me a good excuse to do that. ;-) However, it also amplifies the feeling that we're moving (my dining room is THAT wrecked right now), which is not so cool. I hate moving (we're not - it just feels like it).
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I realized yesterday was the 5-yr anniversary (if you can call it something so grand as "anniversary") of this not-so-esteemed, poorly maintained blog. That in itself isn't all that exciting. But, it was a strange feeling to go back and look at my first few blog posts from summer, 2005 and realize that it's only been five short years since the content of those posts was my everyday. Sometimes it feels like yesterday, but more often than not it seems like eons ago. Regardless, this "anniversary" seemed like a nice opportunity to reflect a little. So, I started listing off things that have changed in five years, and it was a pretty significant list... to me anyway. In chronological order, major events: mom passed away from ALS; I finished grad school at Cincinnati; Aaron and I got married; Aaron and I moved to Lawrence, KS; I started my career at KU; we bought our first house; Cecilia was born, and in a rather life-changing fashion, at that.
I've kept journals since the 4th grade. No kidding. My first few journal entries basically talk about how I had pancakes for breakfast that morning, and my brothers were being mean to me. I think there are four volumes from high school alone (especially embarrassing to read now). I guess it's a nice feeling now, to be able to look back at journal entries (and blog posts) over the last five years, and not feel consistently personally humiliated by what I wrote! I wonder what that is a sign of... probably mostly self-censorship, increasingly thick skin, and a dash of increased emotional maturity. ;-) Whichever the case, it saves me the pain of thinking "How could I think that, let alone write it?", but I always feel a little like I've cheated on that akward part of me when I don't feel some mixture of guilt and embarrassment when reading my entries. I can recognize that this is odd, so perhaps in another 5 years I'll have learned to embrace it. I hope not, though.
Enough reflecting. I am starting to embarrass myself.
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